Monday, April 23, 2012

Random Randomness...

Well not a lot has happened, we are continueing our home search. And let me tell you , as a property virgin. I am so confused, my husband and I have looked at about 15 homes. We have made offers on 2 different ones and lost both. I mean I am so stressed out right now. I am realizing my mood effects my weight, and my breasts. I never realized how much emotions play into your body. But back to house shopping. The first one we looked at, we liked, so held off to see what else there was. The Husband was scared about if we pick the 1st one we may loose out on the next one. So we put in an offer on a 2nd one we both loved the kitchen....Well we didn't get it, to our relief. So our journey continues.
I guess maybe I am being too hard on myself, I feel like crying. I want the best for my family and I get such a mindset that I can't see anything else and I obess about everything. I started thinking about some of the other homes we have looked at and needless to say. One of them is out because of a silo, do you believe that one?? I mean a silo, means it can have animals, not that we would have any other than our dogs and a cat. But with our loan it is a no go. And we can't have anything with peeling paint, or stucco showing. Oh and we can't have a trailor no matter how nice it is or how much improvements are made. So that leads us to just a hand full of houses. And the husband is a music nerd. He has a large DJ system that he plays once in a while, so that rules out anything in town. I mean he could play at madison square garden and people across town would be able to hear him I think. So we can't have any close neighbors. That leaves us with even fewer houses, and I don't want to leave the school district. Some people may think I am being foolish, but my boys are my world. They are in school and are happy with friends they have had since they started. I moved around a lot, I only went to 9th grade and I went to 13 different schools. I was a loner because of that. I don't want my kids to be that way. I want them to have bonds with there friends, not be like me and think every friend is replacable. I think that is the best way to put it. I have 2 people whom I talk to that I have known since I was really young. Now are these 2 people whom I am in constant contact with no. If I don't speak to them for a couple of weeks, things are fine. We aren't close like that. I am very upset because I see woman who have had friends since they were kids and are lifelong friends..I don't have that and I think it is because I moved around so much, I am not doing that to my kids. Even if it is our last move. I don't know, maybe it is me. And I have to work on that one. But that is another story. Well time to go..

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